Chapter 558: Really Daring

The sentence "Thieves Financial Co., Ltd." made everyone laugh.

"What a thief of God. Financial shares."

"Financial company: I'm offended."

"Chen Xiaoer has a good background, he is an employee of Tangtang Financial Company."

The barrage has begun to connect the two programs.

I was so impressed. I just finished watching "Cops and Thieves".

The applause was very warm.

"How many people are there in your company?"

"More than a hundred people."

Li Zhanshan was shocked, good guy, "More than a hundred thieves?"

"Not all thieves."

Liu Qun waved his hand, "They are not all thieves. We are the only two who really insist on working on the front line."

"Which two people?" Li Zhanshan asked.

We promised to change this, but Chen Xiaoer didn't join in. What a pity.

"One is called Chen Xiaoer."

Li Zhanshan said: "I know this person!"

"Hey, have you been stolen by him too?"

"no."

"What about you?"

Li Zhanshan suppressed a smile, "He must be the one who was arrested just now."

The audience laughed.

They all gave applause.

The cross talk and the sketch are actually linked, which is really interesting.

Liu Qun clapped his hands and said sadly: "It's over, there is one less worker."

"There are over a hundred of you, where are the others?"

Liu Qun smiled naively: "They are all leading cadres."

The sketch was full of jokes and made everyone laugh.

"Does your thief company still have leading cadres?"

Liu Qun was unhappy and said sternly: "Hey, you are right! The train runs fast because of the headband. Cadres take the lead, and thieves have the energy. If a thief has no leader, he must not be able to steal well. It is not stealing. If you get too little, you just can’t run away.”

There was thunderous applause.

It tastes like that.

The flavor of "Clever Name".

There was a burst of cheers.

"Yes! Then what cadres do you have?"

Liu Qun counted on his fingers: "A general manager."

"oh."

"Forty-eight deputy general managers."

The irony came out immediately.

The previous sentence is okay, everyone says so, and it's very common to see something like a locomotive.

But with forty-eight deputy general managers, the smell is even more intense.

The barrage flew up with excitement.

"Football Association: It's bad, you are coming for me this time!"

"Basketball Association: Why do I feel like this is coming for me?"

"Stop talking about it, I think this show is going to be banned."

"Is this the CCTV Spring Festival Gala? I can actually see such an explosive program?"

The viewers expressed disbelief that it was just the Shanghai TV station, while the local TV stations were larger and freer.

I don’t know how many times I’ve been complained about. It is said that Shanghai TV received more complaints in those days than in previous years.

I thought he was honest in his promise, but in the CCTV Spring Festival Gala, he gave those who objected a big sinus. I didn't know I was wrong, but I will dare to do it next time.

"Forty-eight people?" Li Zhanshan asked again.

"Each one should take charge of his own business."

"What do you care about?"

Liu Qun counted on his fingers: "Some are in charge of administration, some are in charge of business, some are in charge of organization, some are in charge of publicity, some are in charge of logistics, some are in charge of having two or three more children..."

Everyone laughed. What does it mean to keep up with the facts? This is called keeping up with current events.

The word "promise" here has been changed again. Doesn't everyone encourage having a second child?

Every time Liu Qun counted Li Zhanshan, he remembered one. Something was wrong.

"No, wait a minute, wait a minute, wait a minute, your thieves company still plans to have children?"

Liu Qun waved his hand and said, "Hey, what you said is that the whole country is playing chess, and we thieves are no exception. Otherwise, if people encourage more children, we thieves will not have more children, and young thieves will become thieves, and thieves will become big thieves, and big thieves will become old. Stealing, there are more and more good people and fewer and fewer thieves. Who among us will steal?"

The audience laughed out loud, there was still a young thief.

Thunderous applause.

But everyone couldn’t laugh anymore.

Why does it always feel like something is wrong?

The words "thief" and "thief" are interchanged, and it can be used on them!

"Fuck, you're awesome! How dare you say this?"

"I'm convinced, can this pass the trial?"

"Let me go, there are people who have slipped through the net and are openly complaining about national affairs."

"It doesn't count. After all, I was right. If you don't give birth to me, who will be the thief?"

Yu Tianlei is so courageous. The camera scans the audience in the front row and highlights a person who is not afraid of death.

It’s not for nothing that Yu is brave. The special audience in the front row looked calm and could not see any changes in their emotions.

"You are doing this for ecological balance," Li Zhanshan said with a smile.

Liu Qun said seriously, "Of course, this is all at the upper level. When it comes to the departments at the lower level, the division of labor is even more detailed."

The jokes written more than thirty years ago are still timeless now. Not only are they not outdated, but they are even more ironic.

What it was like more than thirty years ago is what it is still like now.

What does it mean to criticize the current evils? This is it.

It's nothing to mock the poor people, it's nothing to mock the disadvantaged groups, it's your ability to dare to make fun of those who have an iron rice bowl.

The applause resumed.

"What subjects are there?"

Liu Qun continued: "Take the Security Department as an example..."

Li Zhanshan was no longer calm, and the audience laughed.

"No, no, no, wait a minute, why does your thief company need a security department?"

The audience in front of the TV laughed so hard that their stomachs hurt. The thief cried out to catch the thief. The thief company also has a security department.

Liu Qun began to perform: "It's necessary. More than a hundred thieves gathered together. If there is no security department, what things in the company will disappear in a blink of an eye?"

With a serious face and funny words, the laughter never stopped.

The barrage has been completely in a carnival.

The crosstalk didn't say anything, but the audience had already imagined it.

"Don't talk about the thief company. Our company's toilet paper will disappear once you put it up."

"What hand sanitizer, notebooks, signature pens, and printing paper are all taken away by you."

"What's this? Once our department vacated a file cabinet, guess what? Hey, it disappeared the next day!"

"There is only more outrageous, not the most outrageous."

"Our company stipulates that you can only apply for one roll of garbage bags at a time. This thing is not expensive, but people can't stop taking it home!"

The barrage has become a scene of complaints.

Whether it is a government unit, a state-owned enterprise or a private enterprise, this situation is common.

"It is very necessary for the thief company to have a security department."

"Hey, if you put it that way, we also need a security department."

"I see, one section chief and forty-eight deputy section chiefs, right?"

Classic crosstalk often resonates with everyone.

Liu Qun is still saying, "The No. 1 document issued by our company in 2025 clearly states: The more thieves there are, the more we need to strengthen anti-theft work!"

The applause at the scene drowned the whole audience like a tsunami.

Real art is like this, touching people's hearts.

"It's hard to prevent thieves at home!" Li Zhanshan sighed.

The crosstalk is not over yet, Liu Qun continues to fire.

"Of course, these are all permanent institutions. If there is a central task, many temporary institutions must be added."

The taste is getting more and more authentic.

What unit has permanent institutions and temporary institutions? The answer is self-evident.

"That's a lot. You should set up a Spring Thief Office during the Spring Festival, right?"

"What? Spring Thief Office?"

Liu Qun explained: "A surprise theft office during the Spring Festival, referred to as the Spring Thief Office."

The applause was so enthusiastic.

"What about Women's Day?"

"Set up a Women's Thief Office."

"May 4th Youth Day?"

"Youth Thief Office!"

Liu Qun smiled and said, "Today's Spring Festival Gala, we also set up a Supervision Office."

"Are you stealing here?" Li Zhanshan called out: "Everyone, be careful!"

"Our colleagues are here in person!"

Li Zhanshan understood, "Chen Xiaoer!"

The camera turned to Chen Lezhang who was sitting in the audience.

The applause was even more enthusiastic.

Dream linkage.

"In fact, they are all fictitious organizations. It has nothing to do with it. This person is idle. He said he wanted to streamline for several years. The first time he streamlined, there were only about 60 people left. The second time he streamlined, there were more than 80 people left. The third time, there were 120 people."

The applause was loud. This person is really good. He dares to say anything.

"The more you streamline, the more people you have?"

Liu Qun spread his hands, "There's nothing we can do. They all came here through the back door with connections. They were sent by their superiors. They have to be cadres when they come. In fact, our unit is very professional. It's not that a person comes to work as a cadre. A layman leads the experts and gives blind orders. There is no such thing as no trouble. You say this person is good, but his superior says no; you say this person is not good, but his superior says yes, and you are still angry. There is a couplet circulating in our place, which is very telling."

The audience wanted to stand up and applaud him.

"What couplet?"

Liu Qun shook his head and sighed, "The first line is, if you say you are good, you are good, and if you are not good, it's okay."

"If you say you are not good, you are not good, and if you are good, it's okay."

"If you are not good, you are not good, and if you are good, it's okay."

"If you are good, it's okay."

The applause at the scene almost overturned the roof, and the applause did not subside for a long time.

The barrage was all exploded.

"Football Association: Read my ID card."

"Basketball Association: Aqiu!"

"I'm convinced, I'm in awe."

"Oh my god, you're so brave!"

"What is art! This is art!"

Liu Qun continued to complain, "The most terrible thing is to set up a team and issue a target of several thousand yuan."

Li Zhanshan laughed, "Then steal it."

"It's easier said than done. You haven't stolen recently..."

Li Zhanshan responded and then reacted, "That's - I haven't stolen it!"

Liu Qun acted vividly, like a complaining cow and horse: "You said, we don't have enough people to steal big items, and it's not worth stealing small items. I dare not withdraw the passbook after stealing it. I want to steal cash but I'm afraid of running into plainclothes police. Sometimes I'm exhausted. I work hard, but I can't steal tens of thousands of yuan a day."

The audience laughed, what a guy, stealing tens of thousands a day and still not satisfied. "No, the key is that the fast stealing can't catch up with his slow spending."

"There are more than a hundred thieves in our company. They eat, drink, defecate, sleep, move, sit, lie down and walk. This costs money, right?"

This is not bad, it's normal.

"Going to tourist spots to study and hold meetings endlessly, this costs money, right?"

"That's not all. Our leaders also have to go abroad for inspection! You said you are a thief company, why did you go abroad for inspection? You said you were going to learn advanced foreign theft technology!"

The truth was revealed. Is this a thief company?

Many people knew it.

Some people applauded vigorously.