Chapter 168 Mission 015
The heavy rain poured down. Song Lin stood at the gate of the community, soaked, and looked back at the residential buildings with an embarrassed look. A bunch of warm lights were reflected through the glass windows. One of them was his mother's home - but not his home.
Tonight is New Year's Eve, the last day of the lunar year. He came to visit his remarried mother's home, holding gifts in his hands, just like those ordinary relatives who came to pay New Year's greetings and give gifts. In the end, he was urged to leave by his mother without even drinking a sip of water.
Just a few steps out of the door, the drizzle turned into a downpour, but the door that was closed to him never opened again.
He didn't bring rain gear, so he could only stumble in the heavy rain in a mess. Looking back, he saw a figure in his mother's house pulling the curtains, blocking his sight.
The scene of his mother caring for him when he was young and the cold face of his mother just now were constantly intertwined in his mind. Song Lin walked slowly, and the rain flowing down his face was not sure if it was tears.
Back in the deserted and dilapidated old house, Song Lin sat on the threshold, staring blankly at an old, peeling wooden table in the living room.
When he was young, his parents were still around and his grandmother was still alive. Every Chinese New Year, the family would always gather around this big wooden table to make dumplings, and what he liked to do most was to use the dough that his mother used to roll out noodles as plasticine to knead all kinds of strange things, and then his mother would always slap his hands hard for making trouble. However, his mother would never really punish him during the Chinese New Year, so he was always the most unscrupulous at this time...
And now... this old house that carried the ordinary but beautiful time of his childhood is gradually dilapidated and riddled with holes, and only he is left alone.
Tomorrow is the first day of the Chinese New Year. It stands to reason that he should go to his father's remarried home to celebrate the New Year, but facing his mean stepmother and silent father, he always stays for a short time. Today, he was just "driven" out by his mother's cold urging. The downpour made his heart cold, so Song Lin decided not to go anywhere tomorrow.
Song Lin thought so, but he still hoped that his father would take the initiative to call him on the first day of the Chinese New Year to celebrate the New Year together. However, he waited until late at night and until the second day of the Chinese New Year, but the old but still unbroken phone in the old house, which he had checked many times, never rang.
Then he never took the initiative to visit the two houses again.
His parents' cold reception made him more degenerate. He knew that his bad reputation made his parents embarrassed. Occasionally, they would scold him for embarrassing them.
But they didn't know that when he heard them scolding him for embarrassing them, he felt happy.
Perhaps only at this time, he, a wild child who no one wanted, would have a place in their hearts, at least they could remember that he was still their biological son.
In fact, he was very smart. Even if he didn't use this intelligence in his studies, he could make himself very well in this big dye vat society. He was a boy who had not yet reached adulthood. With his intelligence and ruthlessness, he was able to manage several younger brothers and had some face in this small area.
However, no matter how precocious and smart Song Lin was, he was still just a child after all.
He accidentally ran into the scene of Brother Huzi trading drugs with others. At that time, he was so scared that he was sweating all over. He knew that if Brother Huzi knew about it, he would either be forced to participate in drug trafficking and drug use, or be tied with stones and put into a sack and sunk into the river.
In the end, he escaped. Unfortunately, he was discovered when he escaped. Fortunately, Brother Huzi's people did not find out that it was him.
<<<<<<<<<<<< <
For someone like Brother Huzi who would rather kill the wrong person than let him go, just a little suspicion of Song Lin was enough to make him take action against Song Lin.
Song Lin thought he was doomed and thought about how to save his life first and then find other things. Unexpectedly, he was rescued by someone, and it was his nerdy deskmate who rescued him!
His impression of his new deskmate is that he is good-looking and has good grades, but his personality is a bit annoying, and he is even more arrogant than him!
His deskmate is called Xiao Yan.
He clearly realized that he and Xiao Yan are not from the same world.
However, when he was rescued from a dozen big men by Xiao Yan, and when he saw Xiao Yan easily deal with those lackeys of Brother Huzi, Song Lin was a little reluctant to admit that he actually had a little admiration for that kid.
Xiao Yan saved him this time, which can be said to be saving his life. This favor made him and Xiao Yan closer.
He began to study hard and stopped wasting time... Well, the most important thing is to surpass that kid in the next monthly exam!
Although he also felt that Xiao Yan's grades were really scary and he might never be able to surpass them, but no one stipulated that he could not fantasize, right?
At first, it was because of his admiration for his martial arts prowess, his dissatisfaction with his provocation, and his dissatisfaction with his grades far exceeding his own... But gradually, as he got to know Xiao Ying more and more, Song Lin found that he knew less and less about him, and he seemed to have only seen the tip of the iceberg of that guy.
Putting aside the idea of competing with him, Song Lin's attention to him increased day by day.
He found that Xiao Ying's attitude towards a girl named Li Yuechen in the class was different. He was always more patient with her and smiled at her more often - at least much more often than he smiled at him╭(╯^╰)╮
This made him very unhappy. In his opinion, Li Yuechen was just an ordinary girl, and there was nothing worth paying attention to except that her grades were slightly better.
Did Xiao Ying notice Li Yuechen because of her good grades?
Song Lin was very dissatisfied when he saw Xiao Ying neglecting him because of Li Yuechen and putting his love before his friends. Sooner or later, his grades would surpass that girl's!
However, fate always plays tricks on people.
Song Lin thought that his attention to Xiao Ying came from his admiration for the strong, his concern for his friends and his gratitude for his benefactors. He thought that his dislike for Li Yuechen was simply because he was unhappy with her and their auras were not compatible. It was not until he went to high school and Xiao Ying and Li Yuechen confirmed their relationship that he realized his thoughts...
He, he actually...actually fell in love with her...
Song Lin felt terrified and chose to escape when no one knew about it except himself.
He silently distanced himself from Xiao Ying. Although he took the initiative to distance himself, he felt sour and uncomfortable when he saw that Xiao Ying and Li Yuechen were still sweetly together and had no reaction to his estrangement.
He could only hide in a corner unknown to anyone like a wounded lone wolf, licking his wounds silently, watching... them silently.
<<<<<<<<<<<<
In this era when the Internet is not very prosperous, falling in love with the same sex is a matter of great devastation for a student.
Song Lin almost collapsed after realizing his own thoughts. He did not dare to say it out loud, or even show it.
As time passed and his experience grew, Song Lin would no longer be panicked by such things, but he had become so estranged from Xiao Ying that he could never go back to the past because of his reckless distance.
Watching Xiao Ying and Li Yuechen being as sweet as ever for several years, Song Lin did not have the courage to take that step beyond. He could only bury the thoughts in his heart deeply and continue to play the role of an ordinary classmate who was not very close to the couple.
It was not that he did not try to find some comfort in places like bars, but what made him feel bitter was that he had no feelings for men!
As Song Lin drank, he recalled a sentence he had read in a book: There is no reason to fall in love with you, but you are unique to me.
He was luckier than many people because he met his unique love very early, but he was more unlucky than many people because he gave up and stayed away from her - what a stupid and ridiculous behavior, but unfortunately he never had a chance to save it.
He was there when Xiao Ying proposed to Li Yuechen, and even part of the scene when Xiao Ying proposed was arranged by him.
Song Lin felt that he was really a fool who was asking for trouble. He had obviously thought about letting go completely, but he always had that unrealistic thought in his heart. In the end, when that person was about to propose to his rival, he asked for help but couldn't bear to refuse. He was obviously bleeding with heartache, but he still had to smile and promise to complete it perfectly...
When watching Xiao Ying propose to Li Yuechen, he had a bit of evil in his heart - how he hoped she would refuse at this moment! No matter if she was reserved or reluctant, as long as she said no this time, he would do whatever it takes to get her back!
However, she did not give him any chance, she agreed...
Looking at the two people hugging each other, Song Lin felt as if he had returned to the rainy New Year's Eve of that year, and the cold rain poured down from his head, chilling him to the bone.
Listening to the booing and cheering of the onlookers around him, and listening to the congratulations, he felt that the expression on his face was almost stiff and gloomy, and the whole person seemed to be in the weightlessness of falling from a high altitude into the abyss...
He didn't know how he left the proposal scene, and when he came to his senses, he had left Shuimu University and returned to his own school.
Not long after he came back, he received the engagement invitation from the two people. Looking at the two names on the invitation, he tore the invitation into pieces and threw it into the trash can with an expressionless face, and then went to find his tutor to apply for a place as an exchange student at a foreign university.
Song Lin felt that he couldn't stay in China to face all this, let alone pretend to be calm and attend the engagement party.
Maybe he would regret it once he went abroad, maybe when he came back home, they would be married and have children... But he still wanted to escape at this moment.
He stood at the airport with his suitcase, and beside him were several other exchange students who were saying goodbye to their relatives and friends. Only he was alone, without anyone to see him off, standing alone.
Listening to the voice of the airport broadcast urging passengers to board the plane, Song Lin walked towards the security check and looked back, but he didn't see the person he wanted to see...