Chapter 1147 (·??·?)??? I Promise Not to Talk Nonsense!

Wen/Wen-English

01

Yuxuan sat at the desk, and suddenly, tears fell like rain, and she couldn't cry.

Ten minutes ago, Yuxuan, who was busy working in front of the computer, was startled by a loud "snap". When she looked up, her beautiful and delicate female boss Gu Jing said to her in a cold voice:

"Come to my office!"

Frightened by her boss's attitude, she twitched nervously, and quickly reviewed her recent work. After finding that there was nothing serious wrong, she felt relieved and followed Gu Jing to her office.

"How do you feel about your work performance recently?"

"It should be okay." Yuxuan replied hesitantly.

She didn't quite understand what Gu Jing meant. Based on her understanding of this boss, she seemed to have never really been in charge of her work. In fact, Yuxuan's projects have always been smooth, and the client is very satisfied. Colleagues are also cooperating well, and everything is under Yuxuan's control.

"But I'm very dissatisfied. Go back and think about it yourself. If you continue like this, you can resign yourself in a month."

Yuxuan looked at Gu Jing in shock, and was speechless for a while.

She watched Gu Jing wave her hand irritably, and said, "Go out!"

Yuxuan came out of Gu Jing's office dragging her stiff feet, and sat at her desk feeling dazed.

After a few minutes, I felt my tears had already flowed down my face, and watched them fall on the desk like beads in a daze, splashing small splashes one after another.

02

Gu Jing joined the company a year ago, and became Yuxuan's immediate boss as soon as she joined the company, as well as the director of the company's project department.

It is said that she was very good friends with the general manager before joining the company, and the general manager even specially delivered a welcome speech in the company's auditorium for Gu Jing's joining.

Almost on Gu Jing's first day at the job, everyone in the project department knew that this new boss was a celebrity in the eyes of the general manager.

These people in the project department are fine, and they always follow Gu Jing's speech carefully on weekdays. Gu Jing told a bad joke, and everyone in the office laughed. When Gu Jing said that the restaurant was good, everyone said when to go to that restaurant to invite Director Gu to dinner.

Yuxuan knows that she is very insensitive to interpersonal relationships, and she has never paid much attention to eating, drinking and having fun. When her boss chats with colleagues, she feels that she can't get in the way, so she sits silently in front of the computer Work.

She didn't even know how to smile when other people laughed because she thought it seemed silly to laugh without knowing why.

So slowly, she found that the colleagues in the office began to alienate her intentionally or unintentionally, and even the colleagues who usually went out for lunch together at noon, and the colleagues who had a better relationship began to find various reasons not to go with her.

Every morning when she arrives at the office, Yuxuan wants to say hello to everyone as usual, but when she sees Gu Jingna who clearly saw her but deliberately turned her head to pretend not to see her, she can't say hello.

Gradually, the dull Yuxuan finally felt uncomfortable working in such an environment, but she didn't think deeply about why she became what she is today.

She works harder and harder, and she can often be seen working overtime in the office at 10 o'clock in the evening.

It's not because she likes to work overtime or is inefficient, but those colleagues who used to work with her suddenly say they don't have time.

She can only be responsible for all the projects in hand, and has to devote a lot of time to each project to meet the increasingly high requirements of customers.

There are more and more jobs to be busy, and there is no one to help, so she starts to make some small mistakes frequently under exhaustion.

Every time a mistake happened, it was her disaster day.

She knew that Gu Jing would not let her go, she would gather all the people in the department and tell everyone how sloppy Yuxuan's work was.

After realizing that every mistake will have serious consequences, Yuxuan's work has become more and more meticulous,

The price is that she gets off work later and later.

In recent months, it has been a long time since there have been any mistakes that have been caught.

She thought that Gu Jing should be satisfied now, but in the end she got a warning from Gu Jing asking her to resign automatically, but she still couldn't figure out why.

One month later, she had to submit a resignation report, and left the company alone!

This resignation became an unspeakable pain in her heart.

03

After resigning, Yuxuan was so depressed that she remembered that I was working in a corporate coaching company, so she called me and briefly talked about her situation. I asked her to meet at the coffee shop downstairs of the company.

I haven't seen her for a long time, only to see a pale and thin girl "floating" in from the door, I stared at her face for a long time before I finally confirmed that she was me I have known Yuxuan for many years.

This woman who has always been in a hurry seems to have become a little cautious.

In the process of telling me, she suddenly started to cry again. She said that she actually knew that Gu Jing didn't like her. After realizing this, she made a lot of efforts to make up for it. Wan Duo went to the gold store to buy a golden Buddha pendant, and wanted to give it to Gu Jing to please her.

But after all, she chose not to give it away between giving it away and not giving it away. She realized that the superior-subordinate relationship bought back with money was not what she wanted. own view of the world.

If there is an ugly side to this world, she chooses to only see the good side.

04

I looked at her with sympathy!

But I know that what she needs is not for me to comfort her, nor to complain to me about how bad her boss is. What she wants to know is actually where she went wrong.

This stubborn girl will never allow herself to make two mistakes in the same place.

I ask her:

1. Have you tried to get to know your boss?

2. Have you analyzed the characteristics of your boss?

3. Have you ever asked your colleagues for their opinions on you?

4. Have you tried to find common ground between you and your boss?

She was silent for a long time, saying that the moment she saw Gu Jing and the delicate makeup on her face, she knew she was not from the same world as herself.

So consciously or unconsciously, he excluded Gu Jing from his work and life circle.

In the first two months, her colleagues did not alienate her. She often laughed and joked with her colleagues, but the moment Gu Jing arrived at the office, she stopped talking.

She thought it was a respect for her boss, but she didn't know that in a sense, it was also hurt.

Gu Jing is a somewhat narcissistic person. At the beginning, she often called Yu Xuan to the office, but what she talked about was not work, but her past achievements. This is to establish a superior-subordinate relationship.

But Yuxuan didn't agree, her disapproval was directly on her face, and she just told Gu Jing directly: "I know you are bragging again!"

She believes that as long as she has strong working ability, it is enough to do her best job. Knowing about her boss is not in her consideration, and it is not worth wasting time. Not to mention analyzing the personality traits of your boss.

As for asking for feedback from her colleagues, perhaps she was afraid of hearing something embarrassing from them. She never asked them what they thought of her, or had any suggestions for getting along with Gu Jing.

Yuxuan finally concluded that I have never done the four points you mentioned.

05

Yuxuan's problem is a common problem among many people in the workplace, that is, she lacks the ability to communicate upwards, which can also be said to be the ability to "manage" her boss.

There are many kinds of bosses in the workplace. There are good bosses who can really support and cultivate employees, and there are also some "sick" bosses who are either excessively narcissistic, manic-depressive, or passive-aggressive...

We really can't expect that we can meet a really good boss every time.

Even good bosses cannot be expected to be good bosses all the time, they will still be "sick" sometimes.

Just look at the boss

The reason why we can get along well with our colleagues but don’t know how to communicate with our bosses is actually because we put our bosses in a superior position psychologically and put them on the altar.

It has to be admitted that upward communication is indeed not an easy task for the generation born in the 70s and 80s.

Most of them grew up under the "oppression" of teachers. If they were disobedient, they would stand in a corner and copy books as punishment, or they would report criticism under the eyes of the public. mentality.

When this generation grows up and enters the workplace, they actually have a kind of awe towards their bosses like they do towards their teachers. They will avoid them if they can, and will never take the initiative to communicate with their bosses.

Occasionally, when the boss seeks a conversation, there will be a feeling of trepidation, worrying about whether there is something wrong in the work, people will be caught, or someone will make a small report..., there are very few positive and optimistic ones idea.

Here we will not talk about the upward communication of the post-90s and post-00s. Their growth experience in different eras makes them not have too much awe of teachers, which makes their ability to communicate upwards much better than post-70s and post-80s.

It has to be said that this kind of attitude of avoiding the boss will only make the relationship between the two parties further and further apart.

In fact, to sum up, it is necessary to change the attitude towards "authority". Don't treat the boss with a respectful attitude just because his position is higher than ours. As long as we respect him, treat him like a friend. .

The boss is also a human being and has his own advantages and disadvantages. Don't deify him because of his position.

It is very important to understand the boss and his demands. Understanding his personality traits, work experience, family members, personal preferences, etc. can help you treat him as an equal person like you.

We are usually very comfortable chatting with friends, we can say whatever we want, but we are very restrained when talking to the boss, we don’t know where to put our hands, don’t know where to put our feet, and we still stutter when we talk. It is because you put him in a high position, like a totem, you can't have an equal dialogue with him.

Manage mutual goals and expectations

In the company, the boss will regularly chat with employees to understand their thoughts, mainly to understand their expectations and work goals.

But in fact, this work is not one-sided. As an employee, you must also understand the boss's expectations and goals for you, so that you can make some timely feedback and adjustments when deviations occur.

In communication, the boss's expectations of employees will have an impact on employees, and in turn, employees' expectations will also have an impact on the boss.

If there is a large gap between the expectations of the two parties, both parties need to make efforts to adjust the goals or adjust the work positions.

The management of mutual goals and expectations is very important, because it will determine whether you will be happy at work in the future. Employees should clearly state what job they want to do, and the boss arranges the work according to the employee's hobbies and career development path.

For example, if someone is good at getting along with others, the boss will arrange more social work, such as interviewing customers, following up the progress of customers, etc.; if someone likes to study technology, he will arrange to do some tool analysis, form design, etc. aspects of work.

If you don't tell your boss your expectations, he may think that you are suitable for a job that you don't like to do, or he will consider your "future" and arrange for you a job that he thinks has development prospects.

So your life will be difficult, doing things you don't like to do every day, and the final outcome may only be to leave.

Relationships are based on mutual trust and mutual respect.

As an employee, don't passively wait for arrangements, especially arrangements that you know you don't like.

We can communicate directly upwards and let the boss understand our thoughts. We believe that the boss will not embarrass you because of your opinions, and he will respect you more because of your fight.

Manage your boss' time

The more things the boss has, the less time you can allocate. As an employee, you should take the initiative to ask him to set aside time for you in the schedule, otherwise he will never think of your existence when he is busy.

We will have all kinds of questions at work, and regularly ask the boss to talk about our future development plans, etc., and there will be many unexpected gains.

Even if you have a chance, chat with the bosses who have crossed the second and third levels, because the other party has a higher perspective and richer experience, chatting with them, the harvest is far better than simply reading some management books.

Some people think it is inappropriate, and some companies even prohibit employees from communicating across levels. I think this matter has to be treated differently. If you go there with an attitude of learning and growing up, there is nothing to be taboo about.

Looking at everyone's career, everyone needs a mentor. If you can often have some dialogues with high-level bosses, isn't that just finding a mentor for yourself?

Furthermore, if you ask bosses of different levels for the same question, you will get answers from different angles, and each angle can give us something to gain.

Publicly support, privately question

Bosses are like this to employees, and employees are even more like this to their bosses. During one-on-one conversations, you can put forward your own opinions, and you can bluntly point out what the boss should not do.

In public, when the boss needs support and encouragement, as long as you can agree with what the boss said, you should express it clearly and be a loyal supporter.

Having said so much, in fact, I think the most difficult thing to adjust is the psychological awe of authority, but as long as we realize this and make some conscious adjustments, it will improve.

If your career development is limited because of this, it is not worth it, but this problem cannot be solved by changing jobs, because the root of the problem is still in yourself.

I would like to use this document to those living people who are still "suffocated" in the workplace!