Chapter 436 Wanted but Not Obtained, What Is Your Life

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"Most people now know that I am an orphan, but I was not an orphan from birth. I used to have a happy family, with a father who loves me and a mother who loves me."

While recalling, Lin Fan slowly narrated the past.

In other words, it is the past of the previous life, and it is also the past of the previous life.

"However, I can't remember what my parents look like and what they do. The only thing I remember is that I have been learning some musical instruments since I was a child, such as piano and violin. It may be because of my parents. Do you work in a music-related job, or do you come from a music-related family?"

This memory was found by Lin Fan from the depths of his soul, and it belonged to Lan Xing Lin Fan.

Unlike Lin Fan on Earth, who grew up in an orphanage since he was a child, Lin Fan of Blue Star originally had a happy family.

But this kind of thing may be even more unacceptable in Lin Fan's view. It’s okay to lose the things you didn’t have, but the happiness you once had suddenly disappeared like this. This kind of blow is not something a child can bear.

"When I was 9 years old, my father passed away due to a serious illness, and my mother also passed away soon because she couldn't bear the blow."

In this way, Lin Fan, who had no immediate family members and was unwilling to be raised by several distant relatives, was sent to the orphanage.

Perhaps from that time on, Lin Fan of Blue Star had already planted the introduction of world-weariness in his heart.

Yes, world-weary.

Lin Fan later looked through the memory carefully, especially after acquiring the skills, Lin Fan checked all the memories in the depths of his mind, and it was obvious that the blue star Lin Fan had already had Suicide thoughts.

After he became an adult, he moved out of the orphanage, looked for a job, and earned money to live, but his life didn't have any goals, no pursuits, just day after day, a repetitive and numb life, no fun, no Color life.

Until I met Lian Xiaoyu.

Lian Xiaoyu said: "You will be seen by many, many people, and many, many people will like you!"

It was like a ray of light in the dark night, shining into his heart, like a drowning man grabbing a life-saving straw, trying to struggle to get ashore.

pity,

The darkness still swallows the light, and the straw cannot save the drowning person.

Lin Fan calmly talked about this dusty past, and looked at the whole thing calmly and objectively from the perspective of a third party, "My parents were very loving. Parents spread dog food."

But it was also because of being too affectionate that Lin Fan's mother couldn't bear the blow and died in depression.

"The two songs "Because of Love" and "Faith" are based on my parents as a reference, incorporating my own attitude and understanding of love, and finally made the works.

In fact, to be honest, I was quite worried at the beginning, would many people think such an old-fashioned song was out of date? "

Lin Fan smiled: "But it turns out that truly touching emotions, no matter how many years they have passed, will still resonate with people's hearts."

Liu Zhengyan patted Lin Fan's shoulder silently, and Tang He also fell silent.

Some past events are too heavy, and just gently lifting a corner to take a peek, makes people feel the pain, helplessness, hesitation and confusion.

Lin Fan returned Liu Zhengyan with a "nothing" look in his eyes, and said proactively: "In addition to these two songs, I also wrote a song at the same time, which is for Lin Fan...that is my own song, Teacher Liu, Teacher Tang , do you want to listen to it?"

Liu Zhengyan and Tang He nodded naturally.

So Lin Fan got up again and went back to the room, and took out the guitar: "The style of this song is quite different from my previous songs, um, quite a bit."

Liu Zhengyan smiled and said: "Stop boasting, you've finished boasting yourself, and the song will come out in a while, and we will have no words!"

Lin Fan smiled, stopped talking, but quietly immersed himself in the melody of the music, plucking the strings with his fingers, as if he was sighing, and seemed to be an old man who had gone through all the vicissitudes of life, telling his life :

"Wanted but impossible

What's wrong with you—"

Liu Zhengyan, who was sitting relaxed at the side, waiting to hear Lin Fan's new song, sat up straight all at once. From Lin Fan's inexplicable singing, or could it be said to be a sigh? Among them, I heard a resonance that permeated from the depths of my heart.

Life is in a hurry, but you can't get what you want. One sentence describes all kinds of life and the impermanence of the world, which arouses Liu Zhengyan's emotions hidden deep in his heart.

Helpless? Do you regret it? Probably all of them.

"It's worth noting

Just talking about the past

When you find out that time is a thief

It has already stolen your options—”

Tang He is not a professional singer like Liu Zhengyan, and cannot understand this song from the perspective of composition and singing, but he is a professional host, and his sensitivity to language and words is much better than Liu Zhengyan .

So when Lin Fan spoke the first paragraph, Tang He was deeply attracted by the lyrics of the song.

In this passage, there is not a single uncommon word, not a single difficult word, just such ordinary words, but they hit the soul with precision and resonate with the soul!

What Lin Fan sang was his own feelings, and everyone who heard this song heard his own story:

"Love is but a fever

Missing is following closely, cough

is unforgivable

but can't stop

hate over the wall at night

is empty

buzzing

Who put a cold gun in your heart—"

Love is a high fever, longing is a cough that cannot be concealed. Tang He heard this metaphor for the first time, but after savoring it carefully, he had to admire the subtlety of the lyrics. Love and longing are sudden and unstoppable. Can bear silently.

Lingering, endless.

But behind these beautiful high fevers and coughs, what followed was even more violent hatred, the pain that could not be asked for, the unstoppable suffering, and after the heart was hollowed out, even a trace of warmth was left behind. Can't help it, even a trace of memory is unbearable, cold.

Lin Fan's voice and tune gradually became higher, and the emotion contained in the lyrics became more intense, as if it had been accumulated in his chest for many years and was about to be released at this moment.

"Oath of old love

like a slap

whenever you remember

just get a slap in the face

Then you can't smell it for years

I can't smell a woman—"

A kind of dull pain spread in the hearts of Liu Zhengyan and Tang He. They felt that the courage disappeared at this moment, and they just wanted to hide alone and cowardly lick their wounds.

But Lin Fan was not immersed in this kind of emotion, but changed his style of writing, from individual situations to common problems, using vicissitudes of life tunes, slowly explaining them, and also explaining himself, with a touch of helplessness, with A touch of self-mockery:

"The past is not like smoke

Yes

Nostalgia in love is not a virtue

It's a pity being in love is not like writing a song

No matter how serious it is, it can’t become a style—”

...

Although Lin Fan said it was a song written for himself, it actually sang into everyone's heart.

Who hasn't had it, knows it's impossible, knows it's a delusion, but still can't let it go, can't let go, can't forget that person?

Some things cannot be erased by time, rationality wants to forget, but sensibility is still involved.

"Wanted but impossible

There is no wise man in love. "

At the end of this sentence, the knot is so hasty, it is like the strings of a zither stopped abruptly, leaving only a lingering sound, which can be heard endlessly. Only the sadness and helplessness left, flooded the mind, permeated the mental journey of life, and covered the wounded soul.

At some point, the two audience members were already in tears.

ps: "Song for Myself", Li Zongsheng